So, we’re almost at the very end of this beautiful, everyday story. This is the sophisticated part of it. Or at least that’s how I’ll try to present it. Don’t keep your hopes too high. Just in case. 😉
Of course we went to Bloomingdale’s where you can get lots of crap for lots of money as well as some reasonably priced stuff that you would actually be comfortable enough to wear in public. And not just when it’s dark outside.
Disney Store on the 5th Avenue is truly magical. You’re greeted by a giant Mickey Mouse, posing as a Statue of Liberty and everyone’s favorite Disney characters can be found there. Really a nice place to see, you almost feel like buying everything but unless you have a huge room and a desperate need to fill it up with lots of cute things you’re never going to need, you’ll be probably better off saving those dollars for something you can actually use. (Jeez, do I sound like a totally sane and reasonable person or what?! Hahaha.)
Toys “R” Us at Time Sq is another place to let your inner child out & play for while. Giant Lego sculptures, Jurassic Park dinosaurs, flying Superman, Barbie house you can actually walk into, a big spinning wheel…
The view from the Top of The Rock at Rockefeller Center offers an amazing look over Central Park and what makes it even greater – with much less people than ESB. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still extremely crowded, even during a week day, but here you can actually move, without hitting someone in the ribs every time you try to make a step. And they call this Rockefeller Center a city within a City. I assume because it has 100.000 telephones, 50.000 windows, 400 elevators, 40 restaurants, 4 subway lines, konzulates, post office, NBC studios…
Grand Central Station is the largest train station in the world by number of platforms. 750.000 people walk in and out and 550 trains leave the platform every single day. It’s famous for it’s clock with four faces, which is known as a meeting point. And you can easily recognize a tourist – they all turn their heads up because the celling is magnificent!
On the last weekend we also went on a Circle Cruise around Manhattan. Didn’t get seasick but more than sick of a man with a microphone. He should get some kind of a prize for being sooooo…zzz…damn…zzz…boooriiiing!! Even now, when I have trouble sleeping, I just think of him and I’m drifting off to my dreamland in the next second.
Almost forgot about the Bronx Zoo. Nice place for a whole-day-trip. A quick $1.000.000 question: Where did I spend the most time at? 😉 Can you imagine there is only 105.000 gorillas left?! Maybe they are disappearing to make space for almost 7.000.000.000 human monkeys making shit out of this planet. If they extinct, before I see them in their natural habitat, I’m gonna jump off from Empire State Building (King Kong style), but first I’ll personally take care that as many sonofabitches as possible get what they deserve, for letting or making it happen. And I swear, on a grave of every gorilla died for an ashtray or anything as unimaginably stupid as that, I’ll turn these words into action!!
So, that was it. I still stand behind my famous quote about suitcases, planes and people leaving. I realize this might make me sound like a terrorist, but trust me, it has a totally different background. I don’t LOVE all of that stuff. I HATE it. With passion! Although, I have to admit, calling JFK to tell them there was something wrong with a plane flying at that and that hour on that stupid Wednesday did enter my twisted mind… May 7th totally sucked. I was a mess. Coming with Tanja to the airport to say goodbye was probably a bad decision. God I hate goodbyes!! After the second one (another friend was leaving for Miami) and knowing that Brando will still be too busy to deal with a major wreck like I was (the man hardly sees a ray of light, stuck behind his computer 24/7, trying to finish the movie… goddamn, he even has a beard!!) things got a bit too overwhelming for me. I was sitting on a subway, trying to get home as soon as possible, constantly repeating in my head: “Don’t let it go! You’ll be fine. Keep your act together. Not here!! Barbiiiii…” But no, I HAD to listen to the music and I HAD to look at the pictures (stupid iPod touch that has everything!!). It was just a matter of time before I would explode. And I did. I started sobbing, crying, I’m sure I even suffered a minor panic attack, because I couldn’t breath for an uncomfortable amount of time, everything around was wet because of my crocodile tears… People started looking at me. I didn’t care. But funny enough, woman, sitting opposite me, gave me the biggest everything’s-gonna-be-alright smile, lady next to her almost started crying herself, men on my right gave me a Klenex, the one on my right hugged me and I instinctively leaned my head on his shoulders… I got a free drink at McDonald’s because I was crying at the register, trying to find a quarter and imagine what else could have happened if I didn’t decide to take it all out that day just to get over it. Don’t even think I’m completely fine now, I just do other (very very stupid) things instead of crying to keep me busy. Maybe I need to stop carrying my heart on the sleeve and focus on being a top class bitch who uses people just for her needs and pleasures and dumps them like a smelly garbage the second after. I wouldn’t miss anyone, I wouldn’t care if someone, 10.000 kilometers away was fine and happy or not… And no one would miss me because, well, because I’d be a bitch!
Anyway, after that little outburst of mine, I’ve even decided to give this American people a second chance. I took it seriously and started reading Why do people love America? just to keep the motivation alive. lol But I don’t think I’m gonna like the States any more just because some lady named Guadalupe, put $3 in a slot machine in Atlantic City, New Jersey, and – KA-CHING! – won a jackpot of two and a half million dollars. Btw, this Guadalupe is a mum of an actress-singer / animal killer you might have heard of. She goes by the name of J Lo. Just in case I change my mind, I have two other books next to this one – Why do people hate America and one by Michael Moore. Gotta keep it balanced.
P.S.: You’re all invited to the Cutting Room next friday for my birthday party. Presents optional but definitely not forbidden. 😉 And if anyone gets lost after, take it as your fault, I’m done bothering the NYPD!